…and you won’t need a big stick.

What’s your communication style? Have you ever thought about it? Consider your friends and family: are you a chatterbox, firing off the commentary at machine gun pace? Or are you an observer, speaking only when you have a point to make? I’d bet money that the way you communicate with the people in your life mirrors the way you communicate with your horse (or dog, for that matter). The manner in which you communicate to your horse has a profound impact on the nature of your relationship. There are four common styles of communication: Assertive, Aggressive, Passive, and Passive-Aggressive. Let’s look at these styles in a bit more detail:

• Aggressive riders want what they want when they want it.  The communication between horse and rider tends to be more of a demanding nature, akin to shouting all the time.  The downside to this style is that it leaves no room for conversation.  A successful rider must be able to hear what the horse is “telling” her and adjust accordingly.
• Passive riders are just the opposite:  they don’t want to force the horse to do anything he doesn’t want to do, so they won’t rock the boat.  It’s great to be gentle and kind to the horse, but after awhile you find yourself nagging because they quickly learn they can do what they want. 
• Passive-aggressive riders are a combination of the two.  These are the riders that don’t communicate directly what they want , and when they don’t get it  they try to manipulate their horse into giving it to them.  One such example would be  a rider who is struggling with a horse  to soften and travel on a loose rein, but the horse resists.  The rider then ties the horse in a stall on a short rope (‘hanging it’) to teach it a lesson.  Once the horse is exhausted from having its head elevated for hours, it will travel slowly and with a low head carriage – but NOT because the rider communicated properly to the horse. 
• The best style of communication for riders is the assertive style.  These riders will communicate clearly, softly, and efficiently.  They don’t nag, or ask repeatedly for a maneuver.  They carefully consider their cues and respond to what their horse tells them.  They understand the “reward-correction” model and utilize it.  This is critical to successful riding.  The best reward for a horse is a release of pressure.  For example, if you want your horse to move forward you might squeeze your legs.  Once the horse moves, you release your leg pressure.  This is a reward.  The best correction for a horse is to make the incorrect choice much harder than the correct choice.  For example,  if I want my horse to lope softly around the arena on a loose rein and he drags his hip and falls out of frame - I will gather my reins, increase my speed, and counter canter him, really driving that hip under his body.  Chances are, when I ask him to lope softly after that, he’ll be more receptive. 

If you practice riding assertively, you’ll soon find that your horse will begin to read your more subtle cues.  Your horse will respect you and be more comfortable when you ride him, because he knows exactly what you want from him.  Many times when a horse is nervous under saddle, it’s because that horse is a “tryer” and he just doesn’t get what you are asking him to do.  Be clear, concise, and forgiving and you are on your way to developing a relaxed, comfortable partnership with your horse.

If your goal is to create a solid partnership with your horse, a good place to start is by determining your current level of communication.  You can do this by performing a simple self test – the results you get will clearly dictate the path you should take to reach your goal. 

Start with a relaxed horse.  Don’t do this on your first ride after a week-long break, or during a windstorm, or the day that they are replacing your roof.  Warm him up until he’s as limber and responsive as he normally is.  If your horse takes a while to settle in, put him on a longeline and let him play.  The goal is NOT to wear your horse down, the goal is to fairly assess his typical level of responsiveness and your communication skills.  If you need to longe for 45 minutes to gain responsiveness, you probably have some work to do. 

You should conduct the exercises in a quiet place where you can focus on your cues and your horse’s responses.  If you feel comfortable with someone watching, have them videotape your ride.  When you are ready to begin your assessment, gather your reins so you have light contact.  For the purposes of this exercise, you should have enough grip that you can make light contact with your horse’s mouth, but should not be pulling or holding him with your hands.  Remember that your hands are a GUIDE and are not the primary method of communication between you and your horse. 

*Start by walking in a 20 m circle in either direction.  How does your horse respond?  Is his body stiff or his shoulder poked out of your circle?  You want your horse to gently arc in the direction of travel, with his nose just slightly tipped in, his shoulders upright, and his hips tracking under him.  How is your body reacting?  Are you unconciously twisting to coerce him to bend?  Are you sitting harder on one seat bone than the other?  Pulling on one rein?  Take note of the cues that are being exchanged and don’t get frustrated.  You are simply gathering information at this point.  Repeat this at the walk, trot, and canter in each direction.  You will often see varying responses at different gaits or directions.  Again, take note.

*Next, practice halting from a walk.  How does your horse stop?  Do you have to pull back?  Does he hollow his back, lift his head, or shift to the side?  Does he slam on the brakes, dropping onto the forehand?  The goal is to stop soft and round, staying in the frame he was traveling in.  Repeat this exercise at the trot and canter and note your results. 

* Continue walking around the arena.  Practice signalling with your body, concentrating on not using your hands.  For example, squeeze your outside leg on him.  Does he get faster or move over?  Does he even acknowledge the pressure?  Alter the pressure points – squeeze your leg along different points on his side.  Do you get a different response as you move your leg?  Practice changing your seat, shifting your weight to one seat bone then the other.  Shift forward and back.  Are you feeling any response from your horse? 

After you have finished testing out your cues, devote some time to just walking around on a loose rein.  Let your horse absorb things – if you’re not used to riding with your seat and hands, chances are he might be a bit confused.  Use the time to carefully consider the cues your horse gave you.  Is he resistant on one side more than the other?  Does he consistently hollow his back when you cue him?  Is he sticky in his shoulders or hips?  Try to analyze all the information that you were given; when you design your riding program this information will come in handy.

It might be helpful to develop a log or journal of your riding sessions.  When you are practicing new techniques, it will help you clearly track your progress.  In addition, journaling will help you notice trends that can be important in your future training or showing endeavors.  For example, does your horse get stiff in his left shoulder when the weather is cool?  Does your mare get backsore when she comes into heat?  If you note trends and prepare for them, you can adjust your training program accordingly.

Hope you enjoy your ride and your first day of riding consciously!  Next up in the series, we’ll talk about what might be causing your horse’s responses and what might help shift you into a more successful partnership with him.

Are you ready to take a critical look at your partnership with your horse?  The first, and most important, step in becoming a better communicator is to be willing to take a long, hard look at what you do, how you do it, and how effective it is.  Every time you sit on your horse’s back, you hold the power to improve your communication.  Competitively riding horses requires a delicate balance between accepting the best you can do IN THIS MOMENT and striving to become better.  Communication takes a lot of work and a rider must always be evolving to try different methods and learn new things.  Don’t accept mediocrity – if you’re not getting the response you want, change it up!

Have you ever seen a performance that flowed so smoothly that you couldn’t even see the cues the rider gave?  Have you ever wondered if you could achieve that same level of responsiveness from your own horse?  FromTheHorsesBack is launching a new series of tips titled “Perfecting Partnerships.”  This series is devoted to training tips and exercises designed to improve the communication and partnership between you and your horse.  Everyone from trail riders to top level competitors can benefit from improving their relationship with their horse.  Stay tuned for upcoming tips on softening your horse, increasing responsiveness, achieving control of your horse’s body, and many more exciting topics.  To start things off, consider the following:

In my opinion, one of the most critical elements to a true partnership is…having a partnership.  If you are looking for the ultimate in communication, you have to log the hours in the saddle.  Just as in any relationship, it takes time and effort to establish trust and communication.  Every minute you spend in the saddle is impacting your relationship with your horse, either positively or negatively.  You must choose to create a positive, trusting bond with your horse before you can hope to achieve partnership with him.  Ground work is just as important as riding.  Get in the habit of seeing your horse when you are with him.  Know his personality, his likes and dislikes.  Respect him.  Don’t treat him as a machine meant only to haul you around the arena or up and down the trails.  A big part of the enjoyment of having horses is experiencing them – so don’t short yourself on that!  If you would like to learn about how to improve your partnership with your horse, check back soon for exercises and tips to start you on your path.

*These tips and exercises are based upon my own experiences.  I am not a horse trainer.  Please use your best judgement and consult a trainer if necessary.