Yesterday was Tiny’s final night at her current barn.  The plan is to move her to a new place today.  I had gone over there last night to ride and pack my things, but I ended up not even getting on her.  We spent the evening just being together.  Yesterday I read a post over at Camera-Obscura that reminded me how important it is to soak in those moments of just being together.   I groomed her and clipped her so she didn’t enter her new home looking like a wild pony.  I grabbed my camera and took her into the neighbor’s field/front yard and let her wander around and graze while I snapped away at her.  It was an amazing night.  The colors of the sky were brilliant as the sun went down and Tiny’s coat shone in the warm evening light. 

Part of me feels sad about the move.  I don’t know why.  I knew from the first week at this barn that I didn’t belong there, nor did Tiny.  But I like the place – the stalls are large and clean, there are HUGE grandfather oaks littered throughout the property, the arena is huge and lighted with good footing, and best of all it’s close to me.  Although she’s not moving far (15-20 min drive vs 5-10 min drive now), it just feels far.  There is something about the security of knowing she’s just down the road from me that I’m going to miss.  I’m nervous, too, about the change.  I really thought THIS place was going to be great when I moved her there, so now I’m afraid to get too excited.  So keep your fingers crossed that our future will be filled with large, deeply bedded stalls and tons of fresh, sweet grass.  We’ll keep you posted!

The Achilles Heel.  This phrase often refers to something that leads to a downfall.  Over the past year, I’ve often questioned whether my horse affliction has become my Achilles Heel.   What?!  I know, I know… Let me explain.  As you know, I have been obsessed with horses from the time I could talk.  Many of the best times in my life have been those that involved horses.  In fact horses gave me my life, in a sense.  When I was young, I was invisible.  Shy, awkward…I had no particular talent and shied away from being seen.  When I first fell in love with Starfinder, my parents (wisely) decided her purchase would be conditional upon me entering the show arena with her.  My intoxication with that horse overcame my fears and that moment was when my life changed.  I learned so much about myself and I came out of my shell.  And I actually was GOOD at something, for the first time in my life.  Competing with horses defined ME for a long time. 

Fast forward 10 years.  I made a decision to give up showing to go back to school.  I had a great job that afforded me the luxury of owning a horse - I gave that up too.  I moved off of the farm and into the city.  I had a plan and a goal, and my goal was to become educated, self-sufficient, and able to return to the life that I loved on my own terms without being dependent on my family for financial support.  Thus far that dream hasn’t come to fruition.  The economy tanked and now I’m stuck in a job that does not afford me the luxury of owning a horse, let alone showing one.  I’m stuck in a house that is barely amenable to having active dogs, let alone fields of grass with munching horses.  And I’m still clinging desperately to the one horse that I’ve managed to keep in my life.  

I’ve been accused many times of not knowing when to quit.  I’ve watched countless people come and go from the horse world.  I’ve seen a few stick around – but those are the people that make a living at it or are incredibly wealthy.  Neither of those describe me.  I’m just a horse loving girl that has kept hanging on for all these years.  But at what expense?  I’m constantly running at a financial deficit and can’t plan for the future because of Tiny.  I look at her and I see her talent wasting away as she ages before my eyes.  And I’m not even “living the dream” – I’m living some B-rated version of it where Tiny lives miles away and can’t remember what grass looks like.  Is there a time when you raise the white flag and surrender?  Am I holding on to hope or holding on to the past?  I can’t tell, but I know it breaks my heart every time I look at her.  Because I know that she’s not getting any younger, and unless something dramatically changes, every day that passes is one day closer to the end of my dream. 

 I might sound spoiled and ungrateful (at least I HAVE a horse, right?) and that’s not how I mean to sound.  I don’t regret holding on to Tiny for a second.  But I wonder if it was the “right” thing to do.   Would I be closer to my dream if I had let her go 8 years ago?  Would she be winning National titles and being loved on by a little girl that gives her carrots every day?  Would I be freer to find a job if I weren’t so bogged down with responsibilities?  And would I be less stressed and happier if I weren’t under the constant strain of financial burden?  Maybe by holding on to the past, I have forfeited my future.  Over the past year of tumult, I have asked myself these questions over and over.  And as I contemplated them again recently, it hit me.  What if this is it?  What if I never have those things that I dream of?  It’s time for me to begin living the life I have NOW, not living for the future that might never come.  Because, after all, what I’ve got isn’t really so bad….

Hey! How about you stop the pity party and hit the trails with me?

This week’s Sunday Stills challenge was a Potluck:  the only instructions were to shoot something fun and interesting.  So here we go!

This shot is one I’d taken for last week’s challenge titled “Hands.”   Unfortunately, trip preparations got in the way and I just didn’t get time to post it before I left for Columbus. 

Grady and his friend Skeeter are great beggars!

I love this shot of Tiny under the arena spotlights

Check out Sunday Stills for other entries, as well as Laughing Orca Ranch, The Skoog Farm Journal, All Horse Stuff, and Baba Yaga’s Mirror,  all of whom frequently participate in the challenge.

A couple of weeks ago, Emma and I enjoyed a long trail ride on a lazy Sunday.  I know I’ve done a few virtual trail rides now, but this ride was one for the books.  We looped through the woods and rode down to the lake to let the girls (well, Abby, anyway) enjoy the water a bit.  Much to our surprise, as we approached the lake we noticed many vultures lurking around the water’s edge.  What, we wondered, could be going on?

Well, we never did discover “what was going on”  but there were hundreds of dead fish littering the beach.  I guess Tiny had the right idea wanting to stay as far as possible away from this water body!  For a brief moment, I forgot we were at the sandy shore of a lake in central Florida.  It looked like some rocky Atlantic beach from somewhere up north.  Well, at least until the smell brought me back to the present day and place…..

After we’d had our fill of eau de deadfish, we began meandering back home via the country road.  We were chatting amiably and our lazy girls were focused on putting one foot in front of the other and aiming straight toward home when we had another surprise.  This handsome fellow beckoned us over to say hi!

He and a couple of his buddies live just down the street from the barn and I’m sure we’ve passed him many, many times on our rides.  Never before has he initiated contact with us.  We wandered over to let the girls say hi and things got even more weird!

This little guy had no fear of us or the horses!  His buddies weren’t so sure and kept their distance, but this brave soul came straight over to visit.  Apparently he thought Tiny was pretty cute, and it didn’t take long for him to make his move!

Tiny received her very first bovine sMOOch!  Actually this was one of many, as the boy took quite a shine to my girl.  Not to be outdone, Abby moved in for her turn.  And the little man did not disappoint….

I bet his name is Romeo or Casanova – he has obviously done this before!

What? You want one too?

After we visited with Romeo for a bit we headed home – the girls refreshed from our break and Emma and I having a giggle over the interspecies love story!  

A while back, I was doing some reading on equine color genetics when I came across information about the silver dapple gene.  I’m always interested in learning new things and when I started to read about this dilution gene, I immediately perked up.  The silver dilution gene acts on black points of the body and lightens them to varying degrees.  This can be expressed as either “black silvers” (white mane/tail, seal brown body, often dappled) or “bay silvers” (chocolate body, silver mane/tail that is darker at the roots, mottled silver legs).  I believe that Tiny may have the bay silver gene, which would explain her unusually light-colored legs and the silver in her mane. 

As I continued learning about the intricacies of equine coat color genetics, I discovered that the silver dapple gene is sometimes associated with ASD – Anterior Segment Dysgenesis.  ASD is an abnormal development of the eye and can result in impaired vision.  ASD is not restricted to horses with the silver dapple gene, but it is thought that there is a connection between the two conditions.  Horses are born with ASD – it is a congenital condition with varying degrees of severity.  There are several signs that a horse has ASD:  a ”pop-eyed” appearance, cysts, cataracts, or abnormal dilation of the pupil.  The retina is also occasionally affected.    So what should you do if you suspect your horse might be affected?  First, have him examined by an equine opthalmologist that has the necessary diagnostic equipment.  It is important to remember that ASD is not progressive and does not result in blindness, and that most affected horses continue to have normal vision throughout their lives. 

Further Reading:

A missense mutation in PMEL17 is associated with the Silver coat color in the horse.  2006.   Brunberg, et al.

http://www.horse-genetics.com/silver-dapple.html

http://www.silverequine.com/

http://old.cvm.msu.edu/research/mregl/asd.htm

I had a great time selecting my photos for this week’s Sunday Stills challenge.  Although I only participated once in 2009, I had several photos that I absolutely loved so I chose from those!  I have to admit, I cheated a bit – I just couldn’t narrow it down further than this.  Hope you enjoy!

I chose this photo of Tiny’s eye because it signifies so much to me.  When I look into her eyes, I see her soul and it reminds me why I love her so much.  Plus, in my opinion she has the most amazingly beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen on a horse.  I guess I’m biased though!

This photo was taken on one of our many trail rides.  I love the way it captures the moment of connection between Tiny and that cow, just that silent acknowledgement of each other’s presence.

This photo was my first foray into the world of photo editing.  I took this photo of Abby one day at the barn and I loved the way the light played off her form.  With a few editing lessons from my artist buddy Luke, I was able to enhance that contrast even more.  Although this photo might not have the best composition, it entrances me every time I look at it.  It inspires me to improve my photography AND my editing skills!

Check out Sunday Stills for other entries, as well as Laughing Orca Ranch, The Skoog Farm Journal, All Horse Stuff, and Baba Yaga’s Mirror,  all of whom frequently participate in the challenge.

I had so much fun doing a virtual trail ride last month that I set out to get some more great trail shots again!  This time, Tiny and I (accompanied by a friend that served as assistant photographer) ventured through the woods down to visit Lake Harney and do some gator spotting.  Unfortunately no gators this time, but we did see a gopher tortoise hanging out next to the trail.  She was kind enough to pose for a few photos before we set out on our way.   Gopher tortoises are fairly common in wooded areas of Central Florida, but I haven’t seen many of them right along the trail like this.  It was a great start to our adventure!  

We continued on through a series of woodland trails and sand roads, heading toward our ultimate destination of Lake Harney.  Along the way we spotted many birds and lots of pretty foliage.  We had great fun snapping shots of our tracks in the sand!  

Photo courtesy of Hazem Behiry

Hoofprints in the sand

Lake Harney is a huge lake – about 6,000 acres –  that is very near Tiny’s barn.  I used to take Grady and Bella to the beach there to romp and play and we would walk the trails that pepper the woods along the shoreline.  Once, we saw an owl swoop down and grab a snake right in front of us!  The lake is always a good place for wildlife sightings and the water is teeming with alligators and fish.  It’s hard to believe that in the heavy rains we had last year, this whole area was flooded under several feet of water for almost a month.  

Tiny isn’t a fan of the water, but she does like to look around and see what is going on out here.  There is always something fun – airboats, birds, fisherman.  Not too much going on this day, just a man and his metal detector, scouring the beach. 

Although we didn’t see much wildlife on our trail ride this time, it was the perfect day to spend some time with my girl.  I hope you enjoyed the ride as much as we did! 

Photo courtesy of Hazem Behiry

For a long time now, I’ve been wanting to do a virtual trail ride post.  Until now, it’s never happened….mostly because I could never get it together enough to remember my camera, remember to charge my camera, or remember to actually take the photos.  Well, the planets aligned for me today and here are some photos of my Sunday fun and trail ride….sans Emma, but still amazing!  Enjoy…

Tiny and her girls

Keeping an eye on the cows

Me and my shadow

Ciao, Tiny! Until next time....

Once again, it’s time for Thankful Thursday! I hope this post inspires you to consider the things in your life that you are grateful for. If you have a blog, consider posting about it there and link back here. If you don’t have a blog, please feel welcome to comment here on what you are grateful for in your own life. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing, then just take a few moments to reflect on all that you have. If you’d like to tag other bloggers that participate, feel free to do that.

This week, I am thankful for all the love I am surrounded with every day:

Happy Thursday to all and please visit these other sites that frequently participate in Thankful Thursday:

Akal Ranch, Enlightened Horsemanship Through Touch, and Tired Dog Ranch.

Once again, it’s time for Thankful Thursday! I hope this post inspires you to consider the things in your life that you are grateful for. If you have a blog, consider posting about it there and link back here. If you don’t have a blog, please feel welcome to comment here on what you are grateful for in your own life. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing, then just take a few moments to reflect on all that you have. If you’d like to tag other bloggers that participate, feel free to do that.

This past Sunday I headed to the barn after a relaxing morning.  It was one of those technicolor days where life had an extra brilliant glow and the breeze hinted at fall, although the sun beat down on us relentlessly.  I saddled Tiny and we headed into the arena for a workout.  The farm was all ours for the morning.  Silence echoed around us and the only other activities were the chickens pecking around the barn and Grady keeping watch from his post in the grass.  I started off our workout with some bending and a slow warm up, just enjoying spending time with my girl.  After we warmed up, I asked Tiny to canter and something magical happened.  She cantered off as always, but I had the most overwhelming sense of wanting to run.  I could feel her muscles taut and strong beneath me, just the slightest hint of spring in her step.  I leaned forward the tiniest bit, urging her on with my seat.  She instantly responded and surged off into a gallop around the arena, her neck stretched long and low, nostrils flared.  We rode like this around and around the arena and for just an instant I was a child again, racing up the hills surrounding our old Pennsylvania farm without a care in the world.  Another lap and I was invincible and powerful, hair whipping around me and tears streaming from my eyes while I laughed joyfully.  We ran until Tiny was lathered and I was exhausted and panting.  I haven’t had so much fun on my little mare in a long, long time.   

Happy Thursday to all and please visit these other sites that frequently participate in Thankful Thursday:

Akal Ranch, Enlightened Horsemanship Through Touch, and Tired Dog Ranch.